10 Steps to a More Likable You

1. Ask a lot of questions.
People love to share their wisdom! Asking someone for advice shows that you value their opinion. It gives them a chance to share their hard-won wisdom. Most importantly, it gives you a chance to learn a little something for free.

2. Listen more than you speak.
When you ask a question, be prepared to listen to the answer. Nothing says “I don’t value you” quite like cutting someone off in the middle of a…

3. Dress for success.
You never know when your next boss, client, talent agent, boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend could walk through the door. Put your best face forward every day by dressing becomingly. If it’s wrinkled, dirty, too small, or looks good in da’ club — don’t wear it.

4. Take breaks.
Give yourself time to chill out. Take personal time every day and do something you love. Treat yourself kindly. Give yourself permission to enjoy life. You know what they say about all work and no play. You know what they say about putting the oxygen mask on yourself first.

5. Seek praise rarely, compliment often.
Find the good in others and tell them you see it. Giving a compliment can feel just as good as getting one. Don’t be thirsty.

6. Don’t gossip.
Don’t be that guy. If you wouldn’t say it in front of them, don’t say it behind their back. You lose people’s trust. If you talk about someone to ME, you better believe I think you are talking about ME to someone.

7. Smile Often.
First, it’s going to save you buckets of money on botox (if that’s your thing). But really, nothing screams “approach me” quite like a big fat smile.

8. Be willing to change your mind.
In any conversation. In every conversation. Be willing to change your mind. That doesn’t mean you HAVE to change your mind. It just means you are willing to, if you happen to be so swayed. It is with an open mind that one truly listens. When the mind is closed, and unwilling to be moved, one simply hears. People can tell the difference.

9. Reach out.
Be the first to say hello. My husband and I like to “hi bomb” people when we walk around our neighborhood…. Once you get in the habit of saying hi, you realize how ridiculous it is when you pass people without acknowledging their existence. Be the first to say hi at a party. I guarantee you’ll make a new friend.

10. Ask for feedback.
But once you do, remember #2 on this list. If you spend your time defending or explaining, you won’t likely have the opportunity to get feedback from that person again. Then remember #8 on this list. You may learn a new way to handle a situation. Now remember #1. Heck. Remember 1-9.